My New Journey . . .

     After the loss of our sweet Jackson, I have been thinking of all the ways I can honor his memory.  Grieving the loss of a child is very new and overwhelming for me.  I wanted a place where I can express myself as I travel down this new path.  I have also been thinking of ways I can help others who are struggling with similar losses.  I have found so much hope and encouragement through other 'Angel Moms' and I want to share it with others.  My wish is to find faith and healing as I work through my feelings and begin this new journey toward hope and peace.  I am hoping this blog will be a helpful tool to express myself and find comfort from others.  I am also hoping it will be a good source for information to educate about infant and pregnancy loss.  I have really appreciated the love and support I have received and continue to receive after the loss of our baby boy.  I am hopeful for the future and I appreciate the continued patience and understanding.
     We have had a difficult time trying to piece together all that has happened.  We have traveled a very rocky road these past two years.  Burying our little boy was the hardest thing I have ever done.  I think about him every day.  This experience has made me even more grateful for my two other children.  My perspective on life and motherhood has changed dramatically.  As a young newlywed, I had so many dreams and ideas for my future family.  It wasn't even in my realm of thinking that anything would ever happen to the contrary.  I naively thought you could have babies when you wanted them.  We were very fortunate to get pregnant right away with our first two kids.  I assumed that it would always be this way. My eyes have really been opened toward pregnancy and infancy loss these past two years.  I now look at others who are struggling with similar situations in a whole new light.  I have developed a new level of compassion for them.  It is really something that you cannot understand unless you have been through it.  I am grateful for my new perspective.  I hope to continually learn from it and be able to care for others in a way I never could before.  
    I will always miss my baby boy, but I want to make something positive come out of this.  I hope to bring peace and comfort to others as I start down the long road ahead.  I am so grateful for all the love and support everyone continues to show me!